As I sit in Panera for going on hour number 3 trying to compile research from 5 other people (4 of whom are not native English speakers) into one coherent paper, I wonder why it was not my calling to be a trophy wife traveling on a yacht and planning dinner parties. I'm good at those things. As Dorothy Parker once said, "I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'm sure I'd be darling at it!"
No, no I know I've got more in me than that.
But still...what if my calling was to be a film critic, or a professional player-with-kittens, or a pillow tester?
And as I write this, I notice that the woman, Selida, who cleans our building everyday has just arrived for her second, evening job- cleaning at Panera, where I sit with my laptop and coffee and cookie (to keep my strength up). I don't think she is thinking about her calling.
I could weep over my selfishness.
Ok back to writing.